So Good It Hurts
Na'Kisha Crawford
ISBN: 9780974476919
Pathway Publishing Company
Reviewed By Cary Merriman
Official Apex Reviews Rating: 
So Good It Hurts
is a moving memoir by author, life coach, and inspirational speaker
Na'Kisha Crawford. In it, she uses the example of her own life to
provide invaluable lessons on life and love for men and women of all
ages. Her ultimate hope: that the chains of pain, rejection, and low
self-esteem are finally broken as strongholds in the lives of those
suffering from them the most.
The main focus of So Good It Hurts
is the evolution of Crawford's relationship with her
boyfriend-cum-husband. From the time she first meets him, Crawford
endures everything from lies to deception to infidelity, all for the
sake of her devotion to someone that she can't shake her attraction to
– no matter how hard she tries. During the growth of her relationship
with her beloved, Crawford herself grows emotionally, spiritually, and
psychologically as a result of the numerous trials that the couple
endures both individually and together.
Of course, not all the
drama exists solely within their relationship; in fact, a large share
of conflict and strife comes from individuals on the periphery of their
inner circle – namely, the woman with whom her boyfriend/husband
fathered a child before he and Crawford became a serious item. As a
result of his spurned former lover's jealousy, Crawford and her beau
are forced to suffer through seemingly endless child custody hearings,
courtroom drama, and even physical attacks; yet, their love for one
another remains strong, and they grow closer and more in love with the
passing of each new test of their bond.
A true price cannot be placed on the invaluable insight that Crawford shares in So Good It Hurts.
Her life is a testament to the strength that lies within each and every
one of us, just waiting to be tapped and put to use for our benefit.
Moreover, to have endured so much adversity at such a young age,
Crawford is possessive of a special wisdom the likes of which is both
rare and often underappreciated.
The true power of Crawford's
account lies in the laconically profound "Real Talk" segments that
conclude each chapter. In them, she expounds on everything from
recognizing a playa's game to choosing battles wisely to tips on
avoiding the fury of women scorned. In addition to the gravity of her
chosen subjects, Crawford's colloquial means of communicating key
points to the reader add greatly to their appeal, particularly for
readers who would prefer to be talked to, as opposed to talked at.
Rife with keen insight and ageless wisdom, So Good It Hurts
is an engaging tome that holds the answers to many questions that keep
numerous struggling individuals up at night. As such, it should be
required reading in various counseling centers, treatment facilities,
and other such agencies nationwide.
Official Apex Reviews Interview: Na'Kisha Crawford (So Good It Hurts)
Apex Reviews: Na'Kisha, thanks for joining us for this interview. We're looking forward to learning more about your book and other efforts.
Please share more with our readers about exactly how this book went from conception to fruition.
Na'Kisha Crawford: I have always been very in touch with my feelings about love and relationships. I know so many beautiful and smart women who are experiencing such grief when it comes to relationships that this book had to come to. I wrote a chapter in I Want it Now! on love and relationships and knew that some day I would have to expand on this topic, sure to include all of the things I experienced on my journey. I think that love is the key component that makes everything else work in life, but it begins with loving ourselves. So many people miss the lessons because no one ever really shared the truth. I always knew that the issues were so real, and I knew that I wasn't alone.
AR: The relationship that you chronicle in the book is the one that evolved into the marriage that you currently have with your husband. Does your bond continue to be strong? How do you two manage to maintain your devotion to one another?
NC: Our bond is a strong as it has ever been right now. We have a partnership that is blessed. We work together, we dream together, we play together, we pray together. We maintain our devotion to one another by maintaining our devotion to God. Some things are just bigger than us. The closer we stay to Him, the closer we stay to each other.
AR: What inspired you to include the "Real Talk" segments that close out each chapter of the book?
NC: The "Real Talk" segments stemmed from the many conversations between me and my girlfriends. I wanted to speak to everyone reading the book as candidly as possible regarding these very difficult issues, the way I speak to my girlfriends. The "Real Talk" segments are the wrap ups, the points of the chapters in a nutshell, including those little reminders that we can tell ourselves and others as affirmations to feel better about grasping something otherwise very difficult to accept. Sometimes, the best way to say it is to just say it.
AR: Throughout the book, you place special emphasis on your relationship with God, particularly how it's helped you get through the most difficult times of your life. At what precise point did you know that that relationship had fully matured?
NC: I can honestly say that the point of maturity happened more recently. I have always had a relationship with God, but I didn't fully understand the strength and power of that relationship until around the time that I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I have learned that God was the love that I was searching for and that He was also the answer to the many questions that no one else had been able to answer for me. I understood that God was within me and that I had to draw upon that spirit to progress. I say more recently because I have been tested, and I am as faithful as ever. The very fact that So Good It Hurts has come to is part of God's plan for me.
AR: If there were only one piece of advice that you could give to someone struggling with the issues that you cover in the book, what would it be?
NC: Never stop believing in love and never stop believing in yourself. To do either is to stop believing in God. Figure out what you need to do to change your circumstances into ones that work for you. You are never alone. What you have gone through does not define where you can go, but how you handle the circumstances will determine whether or not you grow.
AR: Please share more with our readers about your first book, I Want It Now!
NC: I Want it Now! Analyze where you are in life, Discover your passion and Achieve ultimate happiness is a book about turning life's obstacles into stepping stones that create a pathway to a better life. Learn from your mistakes and never let your past issues determine how far you can go in your life. I Want it Now! is a book about reaching your passion and listening to the needs and desires of the person on the inside of you. I also use real life anecdotes to make the point that we each have the power to succeed within us. I started writing it 2 weeks after I started chemotherapy because I understood that time was of the essence and that I had work to do with whatever time I have left.
AR: Also, can you share more with us about your publishing company, Pathway Publishing?
NC: I created Pathway Publishing for the purpose of getting my message, Building positive pathways for life!, out to the world. At the time, there was no room for rejection, I needed to share, and I did it the best way I knew how. I did the research necessary to do it myself.
AR: In addition to being an author, you're also a life coach and inspirational speaker. Please share more with our readers about those aspects of your life.
NC: I love being a speaker and life coach. Both are a natural fit for me in my life. Speaking gives me an opportunity to share with the world, which for me is powerful. I love the idea of inspiring someone to push for their dreams and experience life's journey, and if I can do it by sharing my struggles as well as those of others around me, I am willing. Being a life coach takes it a step further. There is nothing like seeing the result of a changed mind and a happy and faithful heart. Coaching allows me to see someone where they are and help them to get to where they are willing to work to go. I was truly born a life coach, and my passion speaks for me.
AR: What are some of your future plans for your writing and other efforts?
NC: I will continue to speak and write non-fiction books, all written with the purpose of encouraging personal growth and development. I will always work to be an example and share a positive message of empowerment and hope. I will continue to work on building people up. I will encourage people to dream and grow and use the power within them to affect positive change for others.
AR: Where can people learn more about you?
NC: Please visit my website at www.nakishacrawford.com or www.SoGoodItHurts.com for more information.
AR: Also, how can our readers contact you directly?
NC: Email is the best way to reach me: info@nakishacrawford.com or call me at 800.961.9431.
AR: Any final thoughts you'd like to share?
NC: My Mission Statement: Dream Big, Open your Heart, Always have Faith and Follow your Spirit towards ultimate happiness.
AR: Thanks again, Na'Kisha, and best of continued success to you in all your endeavors!